I have been in so much pain for the past 2 days that even a Tylenol 3 doesn't help. I am freaking out because I need to work my butt off for the next 2 weeks if I have any hope of getting my paper done but I cannot.

Normally I would have purchased a turkey by now so it would thaw in time for next Thursday but my husband had to pay our mortgage so as of now, there's no money for turkey--or any of the other things that go into a dinner. My husband says things should show improvement by next May...

It is supposed to rain a lot tomorrow but when I'm in this much physical pain I can't stand to read or listen to music or write poetry or watch TV or anything. I hope the pain goes away long enough to go with the family to see New Moon tomorrow. We've already bought the tickets. Riding in the front seat of my daughter's car nearly kills my hip.

I was talking to this guy in my Paris-Berlin class. He's taking it as an undergrad history class. We were talking about our final projects. He's doing a 5 page paper. I told him that I am doing a 20 page paper and he freaked out. He said there is no way he'd do that for something that only counts for 10% of our final grade. I told him--gently--that he should not consider grad school. Writing 20 page papers is all I know how to do. I'm not great at it because my damn ADHD brain isn't so good at executive functions but I'd rather do a big paper than anything. I've got a topic but the arguments are weak. Come to find out I am not the only student who feels "misled" thinking that this was more of a history course and not a literature course. Several of us wish we'd dropped the class.

My daughter says I'm negative all the time. My husband seems to love "bantering" about everything. He knows I hate bantering. My body reacts to it like arguing. It makes me tense and makes my hip hurt worse. I have a total stress reaction. It like he wants to "play argue" about every G-D thing. I hate it. I need to feel peace and security and love. I need to feel calmness.

I wish I could be pain free for the next month so I could get my school work done.

We're going to move my little LG TV from my office to our bedroom. I can't sit in that office chair anyway and I might as well have it to listen to from bed since I'm spending so much time there. I can only take so much Rush Limbaugh or NPR.